Feel Good to be (TRUE)

Pile of bullshit it's over...really over.
The most annoying problem in the world would be DO YOU HAVE A BEST FRIEND? I used to be quite jealous about people who have their best friend, I mean really best. I have none of them, yeap none, maybe there was in the past but I didn't appreciate any of them and act like a bitch.Uhhuh

I never asked a best friend from God(or maybe yes?)and I really wanted to leave this fcking place as soon as possible. There's no reason for me to continue my living and I even think that DIE would be better, maybe I suffer  in the hell(I'm not a loyal Christian and did lots of bad stuff and act like a bad guy yoluo hahaha) would be better to suffer in this world or maybe I could be an angel flying around the heaven and serves my father,God.

Until 28.05.2014, everything changed.

My friend aka a girl from my play gangs which established on 2014 XD chat with me. I still remember it was the night before that I gonna work. I rant badly on wechat moment and she came and asked me what happened. Yeap it was the first time I can feel the care, the love, the everything that I lost for several years. We have had the same topic and if I'm not wrong,probably was the Mother topic aka saying our mums badword maybe hahaha. I didn't put any wish on our friendship actually since we just start to know each other well. But guess what we talke every night til now which I think it was impossible just really impossible.

In the past, I tried to scroll over my contacts and ask myself "Who can you talk to when you need them or who can you speak to when you need a listener" I usually just draft a blogpost when I need to talk to someone or just crying alone and tell myself the next day would be better. Yeah, I just grew up like that along this years. Or maybe just tweet everything that I think it was unreasonable. How pity am I, HOW. As a Leo, I'm kind of an act strong person and I act everyday just like a Hollywood actress hahahahaah or maybe just like a stupid clown that makes people laugh at (better than a friend which borned to be a clown)

Let me just skip our romantic story or  boring story or maybe memorable moment to the most mthfcka part.

Problem comes, when we're good (my current bestie and let's call her C) people start to say behind that we're LES, I mean it's a sensitive noun in my country and people start spreading. I can't chill nor C but we tried to accept it and looking forward to those challenge that God would give us.I lived in this world for almost two decades and what taught me is just Appreciate.

This would be the most unprivate blog post and the longest onelolol and have pic one lolol. If you haven't met any bestfriend til now, just wait, God will give you one day. Please jealous me to have a Bestfriend or Bestsister or BestDaughter hahahahahah.

First pic right one is me lol.

CameraApp- B612

Effect/Filter- Just try any of it wtf

2013

Time flies, I still remember last year about this time I was hoping that school reopen so I can wear new school shoes use new school bag lol and ofcourse him.  Yup I asked myself before did I regret to give up him, yes why not?! 对于他我还是有保留了一点感情吧 I don't know give up is the best choice or not but at least I grew from it.  Looking back on those post and pictures I really felt sorry to my friends and family 老实说我是个脾气跟不好的人but many people think that my temper is good, maybe when I'm alone I'll start think about a lot of things and hate things that I deserved. 2013 is the most tough year for me, need to 烦 about friendship,family, money enuf or not etc.  Most of the thing that I gained is 心理的一些问题. I hope I really treat myself better in 2014 and improve everything. For my study result feel a bit happy and disappointed like 50% and 50% . But I still think that I'm smart lol.  It's a new year but life still goes on right?  For 2014 I hope that I can lose weight and get slimmer, have more money, better result and 爱我的家人多一些. For love relationship I just no hope for it because 是你的就是你的，maybe my Mr. Right haven't appear yet hmmmhh.  Okay bye 2013! And Hi 2014!

People come and people go.

I do believe that in our life many people come and many people go (leave) , we can hate them but we should thank them because they help us to grow mature and to stay stronger.  When you feel that everyone around you hide things or maybe secret and don't tell you that really means you're not their bestie, friend anymore …? I don't know but in my sight in the past  I will leave them as soon as possible because I feel like its 冷脸去贴别人的冷热屁股 but maybe this is just a 过程？idk. I feel helpless.  I won't do the fault that I did before,  what I can do now is just let everything go and have a wonderful tomorrow 

Probelm.

Such a long time i didn't update my blog. Grrr, exam loh... Many things happened in July,bad things are more than good things. Good things: this time result quite good sia, but i dont to watch he next one. Okay, I should be more confidence i know. But please, I need someone to talk to, I need someone who really cares about me. Why this world is such unfair? The person who paid out more does not get much. Fine, i know the world rules. True friend, i have none of it. I cant feel the trust between them. I can feel they are judging me, hating me and whatever fucking problem. Ah i dont care about their fucking face lah, hate then hate lah. Like i care? please lah, go and see yourself in mirror, and touch your heart, are you kind? Have you been 靠关系 and get someting? I knew you talk shit about me behind, i knew you say im fake because i makeup, what's the logic about makeup=fake? Huh? Dont let me see you makeup nia one day. Keep on saying us dog? Lol lah, ask yourself did you act as a dog or not lah. Everyday help people do this do that like dog eh. I think you should but a mirror instead of saying us dog. Dog so cute lehh. You snake ah. Snake is disgusting ewww. Look like you. Nearly 3 years i get to know you, still same nothing change, u want everyone take your command, but did you think about us? You're not the Queen, the emperor,or my parents, and you wont be! Girl Go look at yourself in the mirror can?